Shattered Innocence Read online

  When I walk into the living room she is vacuuming and swaying her hips viciously to the music. I smack her ass as I walk by and she turns down the racket. “So I got home last night and you weren’t here yet. What were you up to, you little hussie?”

  I laugh. “Nothing, For once.”

  “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

  I tell Lo the whole story. How Damon found me at the club, the bet, and then everything that happened at his house. “He is so damn hot and cold, it makes me crazy. I mean what the hell, everything he has done up to this point has led me to think he wants to sleep with me, then he just takes me home.”

  She shakes her head at me. “Maybe he was just trying to be respectful, ho. Not every date needs to end in sex.”

  “Oh yeah? What did you do last night?” Her face reddens and she doesn’t answer me.

  “Exactly. Now who’s the ho?”

  “Still you.” She turns away and goes back to her boy band.

  I head into my room and get dressed. I have a test today and I’m planning on going to the library before class, because who the hell could study with Backstreet blasting. I say goodbye to Lo and hop into my car. The drive to campus is only about fifteen minutes and I spend every second of them analyzing last night. I need to put him out of my head, at least for now. I won’t see Damon until Friday anyway so I have plenty of time to stress out after my test. Oh my God. I’m gonna see him on Friday. Before I leave for a job. Can you say awkward?

  I’m trying to focus but even in a quiet library it is almost impossible to study. I might as well have been at my own apartment because I am getting absolutely nothing done. When my phone chimes I welcome the distraction. It’s a text from a number that I don’t know.

  Come over tonight at 6.

  Me: How about a hi? Who the hell is this?

  I already had a feeling that I knew exactly who it was. I only knew one person besides Lo that thought they could order me around like that.

  You know who it is. See you at 6.

  I saved his number, and shook my head at his apparent cockiness. Thankfully, I am the type of person who pays attention in class because I wasn’t getting anything done today.

  ***

  I get into my car to head over to Damon’s, and I’m actually nervous. I never know what to expect from him. I hope he doesn’t plan on watching another damn scary movie. Every stupid ass creak or noise I heard last night scared the shit out of me. I freak out whenever I hear someone clap because of that stupid ass game they played, and I’ll never look at a doll or a music box the same way. I pull into his driveway, when I knock on the door it opens. That’s weird. I hesitantly walk into his house, all I can think of is that idiot girl in the movies that investigates a quiet house. Now, I’m that brainless idiot. Great.

  Like the paranoid idiot I am, I pull out my phone and dial 911 on the keypad ready to hit call at the first sign of trouble. “Damon!” I say in a whispered call. No answer. Shit, my heart is racing right now. Honestly if I hadn’t watched that fucking movie last night I wouldn’t be freaking out nearly as much. I walk past the living room, and make my way toward the kitchen.

  My heart is beating so damn hard I can hear it pounding in my head. “Damon?” No answer. Just fucking great.

  Out of nowhere, two hands appear over my shoulder and clap. I scream and stumble, ending up on my ass but pushing the call button on the way down.

  “911, what’s your emergency?” I look behind me and Damon is standing there is hysterics. I’m breathing so hard that I’m starting to get lightheaded. “Hello, are you okay?”

  “Hi…yes I’m sorry…I’m okay.” I manage to answer her between strangled breaths.

  “Is there an emergency?”

  “No…I’m…I’m sorry.”

  I hit the end button on the phone, and look up at the asshole collapsed against the wall still laughing.

  “I hate you.” I shakily stand up, and walk past him effectively punching him in the stomach. I’m almost at the front door when he grabs my arm.

  “Wait, I’m sorry. You have to admit though, that shit was funny.”

  I push him away from me. “No, it wasn’t. I was really fucking worried.”

  He backs me against the front door, causing it to shut. His nose runs up the length of my neck. “Hmmm, you were worried?” I want to smack him and push him off of me, but it’s like I can’t move though, I’m frozen and completely at his mercy.

  As I look into his eyes, any resolve I had is melted. Damon’s mouth descends on me, his tongue immediately invading my mouth. My hands wrap around his neck pulling him closer to me. I thread my fingers through his hair, giving it a little tug. He lets out what could only be described as an animalistic growl. His teeth capture my bottom lip pulling on it, and I arch my hips toward him.

  Damon lifts my shirt off of me, throwing it across the room before burying his face in between my breasts. I moan at the contact and when his hands grip my ass I wrap my legs around his waist.

  A pounding on the door behind me makes me scream. “Police! Open the door!” Damon and I look at each other in confusion. “Open the door, or we will come in!” He puts me down and turns the doorknob. I choose to hide behind the door considering I’m shirtless and have no idea where it went.

  “Hi, officers, can I help you?”

  “Yeah, we got a 911 call. Is there someone else in the house with you?”

  “Yes, my…umm girlfriend.” Girlfriend? Is he deranged?

  “We need to speak with her.”

  “Okay, one second.” Damon looks back at me.

  “Where is my shirt?” I was not going to the door in a bra.

  “I have no idea.” He pulls his shirt over his head. “Here.”

  I take it from him, not being able to stop myself from staring at his body. I slip the shirt over my head, breathing in his scent, letting it overwhelm me for a minute. When I snap out of my daze Damon is looking at me and smirking. “Shut up.”

  He holds his hands up to me in protest. “I didn’t say anything.”

  I walk to the doorway and see four officers on the step. “Hi, can I help you?”

  They all look at me in the t-shirt Damon just had on and I can see their judgmental looks. Assholes. “Did you call 911 ma’am?”

  Ma’am? What am I eighty? “Yes, I’m sorry it was a false alarm.”

  “Are you sure?” I know he is watching me for any sign that I may be being forced to say yes.

  “Yes, sir. Everything is good here.”

  The officer nods at me before walking back to the two patrol cars parked in front of the house. I shut the door breathing a sigh of relief before breaking into a fit of laughter. Damon starts to move back toward me but I quickly dodge him. “No thanks, Romeo. The moment has passed.” I walk over to his couch and sit down, enjoying the look on his face. “So what are we doing tonight?”

  “I ordered some pizza and I figured we would just watch a movie. Your pick if you want.”

  “Okay.” I grab the remote and scroll through the on-demand. When I find what I want I smile at my revenge movie.

  “Seriously? Frozen?” I nod my head at him, as I go through the rental process. “You really want to see it?”

  “See it? I’ve already seen it like five times. I want you to watch it.”

  “That shit was five dollars! You just rented a five dollar movie that you’ve already seen?”

  “Yep, it was so good I actually bought it last week, too.”

  I could almost see the steam coming out of his ears. He refused to even look at me, until I started singing all of the songs that I, of course, knew by heart. The pizza came halfway through the movie, and when I asked Damon if he wanted to pause it to eat he objected. “Hell no. It’s just getting good. Did you see that damn castle she just built?”

  I started laughing and when he realized it was at his expense he threw a pillow at me. This was so normal, and so not at all what I would have expected. When the movie
was over I turned toward Damon. “So what’s next?”

  He arches his eyebrows at me and wiggles them a few times. I laugh out loud at his face and he pounces on me. Damon kisses me and I wrap my arms around him. I move to sit up as if I’m going to be taking his shirt that I was still wearing off, but when he moves I sneak out from under him.

  “What are you doing?” He asks as I’m making my way toward the door.

  “I have no intention of letting you take advantage of me tonight, Mr. Shaw.”

  I walk out of the door mentally jumping up and down with my hands raised in the air. I know that he is probably sitting there still dumb founded and staring at the door. I drive home in a great mood knowing for once that I got the best of Damon. I get a text and when I check to see who it is, I laugh.

  Damon: Well played.

  Chapter Eight

  The week flew by between classes, homework, and planning the annual Halloween party with Lo. I rarely ever take off work on weekends because I need the money, but I did this Saturday for the party. I’ve seen Damon once since Monday, we had lunch at his house after class one day.

  I have to admit as I drive to the office that I’m nervous to see him. This is going to be so weird especially with the way our relationship has been. I don’t even know what to call us. I mean when the cops showed up that day he referred to me as his girlfriend, but I definitely am not. I slowly climb the steps, and when I go into the office Damon is sitting at his desk. He looks up at me before returning to whatever he is doing on his computer. I feel so awkward because he hasn’t even said anything to me.

  I walk over and sit down in the chair across from him, and nervously fidget with my hands in my lap. I hate that I’m acting like this right now. Why all of a sudden do I care enough to feel awkward around him?

  Without glancing up at me he places an envelope on the desk in front of me. “That’s your assignment for tonight. It’s a regular though, so I’m sure you’ll have no trouble.” I take the envelope, but I still remain seated. “Is there something else you need?”

  “Um…no.”

  I stand up and walk out of the office. If this is how things are going to be, maybe I really need to stop agreeing to hang out with him. Bet or no bet, I don’t want to deal with this shit every time I have to come in. Tonight will honestly be an easy night. It’s my third time seeing Brian and he is taking advantage of my lessons. Brian is getting married in a few months, and his fiancée is a virgin that has been waiting for marriage. I honestly didn’t think there was anyone that did that any more.

  Anyway, each time I have seen him it’s to help him perfect a certain skill in the bedroom. He isn’t a virgin but doesn’t have much experience and really wants to blow her mind their first night together. Tonight we are focusing on oral. I know that it may seem like I’m a lucky girl, but it’s not as fun as you might think. It’s not like I can get off when I need to stop every few minutes to give him pointers or teach him new tricks.

  ***

  “Okay, first thing is that you need to make sure she is relaxed and comfortable. Half of the obstacle of getting a woman to orgasm is mental. If she isn’t comfortable or she feels like she is in a rush then you will fail.” I lay down on the bed completely naked as Brian steps closer to me.

  “How do I make sure she is?”

  “Just talk to her, let her know that you’re in no rush and make her feel like there is nothing that you would rather be doing.” I grab a pillow from behind me. “The next thing, put a pillow under her ass. It lifts her up to make it easier for you, and it will make it more intense for her. Also, always keep her legs open wide. It gives you more access to every inch of her pussy.” When I say that and open my legs Brian’s eyes bug out of his head. I forgot how innocent he could be and I had to hold in a laugh.

  “Now comes the part where I need you. Get onto the bed and get down there. I will guide you step by step.” Brian situates himself on his knees in between my legs. I can see the hesitation in his eyes. “You always want to start off by teasing her, nip at her inner thighs, kiss her panty line, and every once and a while, give her a quick lick.” I wait and nothing happens. “Brian, come on buddy. Learning is doing.”

  He follows my instructions to the T, and after a few minutes I grab his head to stop him. “At this point, you can begin to actually dive in. play with her clit, lick, suck. One of the most important things is that you listen to her body. Pay attention, if after certain things you do her hips arch or she moans, then do it more. Lastly, do not be afraid of toys. Vibrators are your friends.”

  I pull out a bullet vibrator that I had stashed on the sheets. “You turn this on and hold it to her clit, as you’re working on her. The only other thing is that she may not come, especially since she is inexperienced. That isn’t your goal though, your only goal is to make sure she feels good. Now, let’s see what you can do.” I extend the vibrator towards him, and he takes it looking like a deer in headlights.

  Brian isn’t bad at oral, except I can sense his nervousness and hesitation. That may also be because I am not his fiancée. After a little while, I stop him. “I think you will do great. Just remember to relax. Oh, and it’s not like she has anything to compare it to.” I give him a few more tricks before leaving, and wishing him luck on his honeymoon.

  Brian has felt horrible about our “lessons”, he feels like it’s cheating, which I guess, in a sense, it is. However, he is doing it for her benefit, so maybe it isn’t that bad. This is my last session with him because we have done everything but sex. He said he didn’t want it to go that far, although I did give him a few tricks to use on their wedding night.

  I head back to the office hoping that Damon is in a better mood then I left him. This past week when we had hung out I saw glimpses of the old unjaded Jessie. As much as I don’t want to admit it, I kind of miss her. The only person I am myself around is Lo, and it’s been that way for three years. I had to create this persona to make it in this business, but that doesn’t mean I like it. Don’t get me wrong I enjoy being me, and for the most part, I’m happy, but it’s been nice not having to keep up the act.

  I open the door to the office and Damon is exactly where I left him earlier. I walk over to the desk hoping things will be better this time around.

  “Your envelope is on the desk.”

  Guess not. Should I say something? What if it just pisses him off more? You know what, screw him. I don’t give a shit if it pisses him off, I haven’t been afraid to speak my mind before and I’m definitely not going to start now. “What the hell is your damn problem?”

  He looks up at me with cold eyes and stands slowly, walking over until he is standing in front of me. “You know, for someone who just had her pussy eaten for two hours you’re acting like a real bitch.”

  My mouth drops open. “You bastard.” I raise my hand to smack him and he grabs it before I can make contact.

  “I’m not letting you get another shot in. Now take your hard earned money and get the fuck out of here.”

  I have never felt so cheap and embarrassed in my damn life. I refuse to let him see the tears that are threatening to drop. “I fucking hate you.”

  “No you don’t.” He laughs. “Now, like I said, take your money, go home, and get ready for tomorrow when you’ll open your legs for some other fucking stranger.”

  I jerk my leg up effectively making contact with his balls. Damon immediately collapses to the floor in a heap of pain and groans. I kick him in the ass just to let out some more of my frustration. Walking over to the desk, I grab the offending envelope and then walk toward the door. Before leaving, I turn back toward the bastard still curled into a fetal position on the floor. “Lose my fucking number, you jerkoff.”

  I make it all the way home to the apartment and into my room before I let a tear fall. I only permit one though, Damon doesn’t deserve my tears, and he sure as hell doesn’t deserve me.

  Chapter Nine

  “You look like shit. What happened?”


  I give Lauren the finger as we are walking down to my car. We planned to go to lunch and costume shop today. I was up almost all night long thinking about what the hell happened last night. “Thanks, Lo. That makes me feel fucking great.”

  “Oh shut the hell up. You damn well know I know you aren’t the least bit offended. Now what the hell crawled up your ass?”

  We get into the car and as I’m driving to the restaurant, I tell her about everything that happened with Damon last night. She seems almost as dumbfounded as I am. I take a break in the story when we get to the restaurant but once the waitress walks away, I continue. “I just don’t get it, Lo. I mean, how can he be this great guy one minute and then such a fucking prick the next?”

  She looks up from the menu. “Because he’s a guy.”

  I nod my head in agreement.

  “At least you don’t need to see him until next weekend.” That was true I took off tonight and tomorrow since we were having the party.

  We finish lunch and then walk around until we find our favorite store to get costumes at. Lo and I always pick a theme, this year it’s Dirty Disney. I pick out a Princess Jasmine outfit and Lo is Tinkerbelle. Both of these costumes would probably be illegal in a lot of countries, but what the hell, it it’s Halloween. This is the time of the year that no one judges you for what you have on.

  We spend the rest of the day picking up food and drinks. Everyone we invited was told to bring some sort of a bottle. This seemed to be the easiest thing to do for a party because then there is a huge variety and usually enough to go around. I couldn’t wait to lose myself in the environment of the party, and drown my thoughts in shots. I needed to forget the green-eyed devil that was constantly on my mind all day. My phone vibrates and my anger only intensifies when I see who it is.

  Damon: We need to talk.

  Me: Fine. I hate you. You’re a dick. I never want to see your stupid ass outside of work again. Nice talking to you. Bye.

  Damon: You need to hear me out.

  Me: No I don’t go to hell.