Shattered Innocence Read online

  I groan in aggravation. “You know, Jess, I have to say I’ve never seen you this irked by a dude. Did you catch feelings?”

  I laugh a little too dramatically. “Who me? No. I just hate that he thinks he can talk to me like that.”

  “Sure…”

  “Drop it, Lo.”

  She holds her hands up in protest. “Dropped, babe. Now let’s go get shitfaced.”

  “Now you’re talking.”

  We carry the mountain of bags up to the apartment and set everything up before going to get dressed. I’m adjusting the costume when I hear a knock on my door that connects to the bathroom. I open it to find Lo standing there. “Help me with my Tinkerbell bun?”

  “Sure, but I need you to do my braid.” We both laugh and then she starts my hair. Once she is done, I spend forever making sure her bun is perfect. “There, done.”

  “Okay, now I need you to fairy dust me.”

  “Excuse me?” I look at her and she has a big shaker of gold glitter. “Seriously?”

  “Yes! Every fairy needs fairy dust!” I sprinkle it all over her laughing when it causes her to have a sneezing fit. There is a loud bang on the door that makes both of us jump. “Come on, jezebel, it’s party time.” She turns and starts to walk away.

  “Hey, it’s Jasmine!”

  Lo waves her hand dismissively. “Whatever!” She hits the iPod dock as she walks toward the door, the party has started.

  Chapter Ten

  I am officially drunk. Every single guy in here has offered to be my Aladdin, some have even just said prince because I’m sure they have no idea who Aladdin is. I’m not into it, though, I don’t want them, and I have no interest in pretending I do. Lo tip toes over to me. I asked her why she was walking like that and she said it was the way Tinkerbell moved and she was in character. She is out of her damn mind.

  “Why are you the ice princess tonight? You should have just come as Elsa.” I give her the finger, which in her state causes uncontrollable laughter. “I’ve never seen that type of behavior from a Disney princess!”

  “Yeah well Tinkerbell didn’t go around grinding on the lost boys so I guess we are both failures.”

  She throws glitter at me from that damn pouch she has been carrying around and then runs away before I can strangle her. I walk toward our bathroom to get a few minutes of quiet and get the damn glitter out of my hair. The apartment was originally meant for three people and has another bathroom so we don’t let anyone in ours. Out of the corner of my eye I see someone standing behind me and yelp in surprise.

  Justin, from my history class, is standing there. He came as a pirate, a very unsexy pirate. I swear when hot guys pick ugly costumes on Halloween it just ruins everything. “Hi, Jessie.” He slurs and is barely able to handle the couple Ss in my name.

  “Wrong bathroom, Justin. This one is off limits.”

  He steps closer toward me. “I wasn’t looking for the bathroom.”

  Great. “Well I’m certainly not looking for a hook up, so you need to go find yourself another wench.” I expect him at this point to leave but he just stands there watching me with hooded eyes. “You need to leave, Justin.”

  His lip comes down in a pout. “I don’t wanna leave.” Justin takes a step closer to me and when I back up I bump into the countertop. Knowing that his reflexes will be slow I move toward the side and inch closer to the door. Justin grabs my wrist. “Don’t be a prude.” Prude? If he only knew.

  I’m about to beat the shit out of him when I hear a gravelly voice behind me. “Let go of her.” I would know that voice anywhere. Damon. It is safe to say at this point, my night has officially gone to shit and my buzz is ruined.

  I turn toward him. “What the hell are you doing here?” He doesn’t even acknowledge that I have said a word to him.

  “I said, get your fucking hands off of her.” Damon isn’t dressed in a costume but he looks intimidating as all hell.

  Justin seems to be too drunk to realize the imminent danger his pretty boy face is in right now. “Hey buddy, if you wanna join in that’s fine. Just no crossing swords.” I gasp as Damon rushes past me and punches Justin right in his face. He hits the floor and is out cold. Holy shit. Damon picks him up opens my bedroom door and then comes back in a minute later empty handed.

  “You done now?” He doesn’t say anything. “You need to get the fuck out of here. You are not welcome in my house.”

  “I’m not going anywhere until you hear me out.”

  Is he fucking serious right now? “I don’t have to listen to anything you have to say. You acted like the asshole, and I don’t want anything to do with your ass anymore.”

  He charges me forcefully grabbing my head between his hands. “Stop fucking talking for once and listen to me. I am not willing to just lose you without a fight. Was I a damn asshole last night? Yes. But do you think it is fucking easy to watch you go off and get ready to have sex with some random guy? It’s not. It’s fucking with my head so bad, but I refuse to walk away from you, Jessie.”

  I push him off of me and turn my back to him. “I need to do this, Damon. You knew about what I did before anything happened between us, so if you can’t handle it now I don’t know what to fucking tell you.”

  “What if you just got a waitressing job and I offered to help you out some?”

  I looked back at him. “Are you out of your fucking mind? I have known you for a couple of weeks! There is no way in hell that I’m going to rearrange my life and accept fucking money from you like some gold digging bitch.” I needed to get the hell out of here right now. It was clear that Damon has lost his damn mind.

  Just as I get to the door, he grabs my hand. “I’ll try to deal with it.”

  I don’t even turn around to face him. “There is no trying. You have made it clear that this is something you can’t deal with.” I open the door and pull my hand from his. “You know where the door is. Use it.”

  I walk out into the living room and scan it for Lo. I see her talking to a group of guys on the couch. I can feel Damon’s eyes on me and I know that I won’t be able to turn him down again, so I make a rash decision. I walk over and sit down on this guy, Dan’s lap. He is in one of my classes with me and has always had a thing for me.

  When I look back toward Damon his hands are fisted at his sides. When he takes a step toward us I panic. Drastic times call for drastic measures. I grab Dan’s face pulling his mouth to mine, taking him by surprise. He quickly recovers and thrusts his tongue into my mouth. It takes all my control not to pull away from him. He tastes like stale beer and his tongue is flailing around and completely out of control. After a minute of this torture, I pull away from him and look back to where Damon had been. Thankfully he is no longer there.

  I get up from the couch and walk into the kitchen to pour another shot. “What the fuck was that, Jess?!” Lo is standing there staring at me.

  I down two more shots before looking up at her. “That was a means to a fucking end.” My words are slurred and barely make it out.

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Damon was here. Now he isn’t. Problem solved.” I shrug my shoulder at her before indulging in more of the liquid that will make me forget anything that is still managing to haunt my thoughts. I walk back toward the living room.

  “I hope you know what you’re doing, bitch.” Lo grumbles as I walk away. Sometimes she can be such a pain in the ass.

  “I do, bitch!” I yell back as I saunter over to where everyone is dancing.

  After a few songs, I feel a set of hands on my hips. When I look back I see a guy who I don’t really know, but he’s hot so I let him stay and choose to overlook the fact that he is dressed as a cowboy. I need a distraction and this one might be just the guy to provide it.

  For the next half hour we dance, and I can feel his dick pressing against me through my paper-thin costume. His hands brush over my panty line as he leans down to whisper in my ear. “Let me take you somewhere and fuck your
brains out.” He doesn’t need to say that shit twice. I grab his hand walking toward my room.

  I turn toward him when we reach my room. “Kiss the shit out of me if you want to go in, give me a preview.” If he kissed anything like Dan I planned on just saying goodbye to him and taking care of myself tonight. His mouth descends on me, his tongue slowly teasing me attempting to gain entrance to my mouth. When he bites my lip in between his teeth I open to him. His hands grip my ass.

  “I bet you have a beautiful fucking pussy. I’m going to devour it.”

  Enough said. I pull his mouth back down to mine, opening my door and backing into my room at the same time. I walk backward toward my bed, and pull the cowboy down with me. His mouth attacks my neck, when I open my eyes I see a dark figure standing in the corner of my room. I scream and the cowboy jumps off of me.

  His eyes follow mine. “What the fuck? Who are you?”

  The figure steps closer, and I now recognize the intruder as Damon. “None of your damn business. You have three seconds to get the fuck out of here.”

  The cowboy looks over at me and then shrugs. “Whatever.”

  What a little bitch. I look back at Damon as he steps closer to me wordlessly judging and berating me.

  Fuck me.

  Chapter Eleven

  “Can you say creeper? Get the fuck out of my room!” He says nothing to me. I stand up and stare at him with hate in my eyes. “You just gonna stand there and not say anything! Get the fuck out of my room!”

  I bang my fists on his chest and he catches them both bringing them behind my back.

  “You wanna be treated like a whore, Jessie, at least let someone who gives a fuck about you do it.”

  Before I can reply he spins me around ripping the flimsy strap holding my top in place, then yanking down the smooth fabric of my pants. With his hand still grasping my wrists, I’m at his mercy. His free hand runs through my hair and then traces the lines of my body. “You. Are. Fucking. Perfection.”

  He pushes my back down so I’m now bent over in front of him. I can hear the sound of his belt and zipper, followed by his pants hitting the floor. I want to tell him to get the fuck off of me and leave, but my body has other ideas. His hand runs over my core, slowly slipping two fingers into me. I moan as he pushes into me hard.

  “You are so ready for me, and I can’t wait any fucking longer.”

  I hear the rip of plastic and my body clenches in anticipation. Damon crashes into me, and I’m so full I gasp. His hand continues to hold my wrists while the other tangles into my hair. I’m unable to move and completely at his mercy. He pounds into me the sounds of our bodies colliding filling the room and only making me more turned on. “Shit.”

  Damon tugs on my hair forcing my head back toward him as he lowers his mouth to my ear and stops thrusting into me. “You like it?” I nod, wincing when it causes my hair to pull. “Tell me what you want.”

  “I want you to fuck me. Hard.”

  His hand releases my hair, and I let out a groan. He still hasn’t moved and I’m getting desperate. Damon’s hand comes down on my ass and smacks it hard. I yelp. “Say please.”

  “Please, Damon. Make me come.”

  I can’t believe myself and how pathetic I am right now. I need release though, and I’ll do anything to get it. His hand runs down my spine causing me to break out in goose bumps. “Good girl.”

  Damon slowly withdraws from me before slamming into me so hard that I swear I thought he would break through me. His pace quickens and his hand reaches around my waist pinching my clit, and sending me spiraling. If he wasn’t holding me in place I would have collapsed onto the bed. He continues to slam into me before letting out a growl and finding his own release.

  ***

  I wake up naked and with an immense pounding in my head. Where the fuck are my clothes? I need water and some aspirin. I throw on some pajamas and as I stumble into the kitchen. Lo is bouncing around singing and making breakfast. The smell of the eggs is enough to almost send me running to the bathroom. “It is too early in the morning for your happy ass.”

  She gives me the finger. “It’s ten o’clock, bitch. I don’t know why you always drink so much. You always end up feeling like shit, oh and turning into a major shit head.”

  “Because it’s fucking fun and I’m a damn rebel.” I down the glass of the water hoping that the pills will take effect pronto.

  “You say rebel, I say dumb ass.”

  “Fuck you. What did I do that was so bad?”

  She laughs before turning back to face me, and leaning back against the counter. “Really?” I stare at her waiting to be enlightened. “Um, you attacked Dan the Douche’s mouth.”

  “What are you talking about?” Then the memories start to come back. Damon, me making out with Dan in front of him, the cowboy, Damon again. Shit, we had sex. Wait, he wasn’t here this morning. Did he just fucking leave after? What an asshole.

  “I see the wheels turning. What’s up?” I tell Lo everything that happened with Damon. “Seriously, Jess? I thought you were done with him.”

  “I don’t know, I just— .” A knock at the door cuts me off. I slowly walk over to it almost tip toeing, fearing that any quick movement may cause me to puke everywhere. When I open it the devil himself is standing in front of me.

  He holds up a cup of coffee, and a brown bag from Dunkin Donuts. “Hey I—” I slam the door before walking back toward the kitchen.

  Lo is looking at me. “Who the hell was that?”

  “Satan.” There is another knock on the door and Lo walks toward it. “Don’t answer it.”

  “Jess, you can’t just do that to people. Besides, it’s not like your hungover ass can beat me to the door.” She walks away.

  “I hate you, bitch.”

  “Love you, too, doll face.” She yells back before opening the door. They are talking but I can’t make out a thing they are saying. I hear footsteps behind me and bury my head in my arms. “I’ll leave you two alone. Listen though, Lucifer, most of the shit in here is mine so whether this conversation ends in sex or a fight don’t break anything.”

  I hear Damon laugh behind me. “Didn’t know you were always so pleasant in the mornings.” He sits down on the stool next to me, but I refuse to even lift my head. I don’t have enough patience for this right now. “So what do you want to do today?”

  I lift my head just enough to see him. “Get away from you and go back to bed.”

  He shakes his head. “The first is a no-go but I have no problem with the second one.” He wiggles his eyebrows and I bury my head to hide the smile that forms on my face. “You can hide all you want, but I know I’m melting that ice queen attitude.”

  I hate him. I lift my head up to look at him. “See that shit right there is why we could never work. You’re just a dickhead, and I don’t have time for it.” His hands grab my hips pulling me so I’m pressed against him, standing in between his legs.

  “If I remember, you fucking loved my dick last night.” I can feel him through the jeans he is wearing and a chill runs through me.

  I push away from him needing some space. “I’m going to get dressed, don’t be here when I get back.” Before he can shoot me some dumbass remark, I go into my room and close the door. Once it’s closed I lean against it, and close my eyes. Damon is like the fucking stray cat that you feed, it always comes back for more, thinking you owe it shit.

  “You’re screwed, you know.”

  I look up at my traitor best friend standing there smirking at me. “Oh yeah, thanks for letting him in, you bitch. What the hell, Lo?”

  She laughs before plopping on my bed. “He has it bad, chick, and you might as well stop fighting it and figure out what is going on between the two of you.”

  “Seriously? What about all the shit I have told you.”

  Lo shakes her head before walking over to my closet and taking out a jean skirt and a shirt. “People make mistakes, Jess, it’s not like you’re Mother Fucking T
heresa.” She shoves the clothes into my arms. “Now get dressed, take the bitch hat off, and give that hot piece of ass a damn chance.”

  “Have I told you how much I hate you?”

  “Yep. But I know your ass loves me no matter what you say. Remember less Maleficent more Princess Aurora.” Lo and her fucking Disney analogies.

  I begrudgingly get dressed, and when I walk out of my room, Damon is sitting on the couch. “See, now was that so hard?”

  I grab the coffee from him. “Watch it, buddy. You’re already on thin ice.”

  As we are walking toward the door, Lo comes out of her room. “Have a good time, Aurora!”

  I slam the door wanting to wring her neck. Damon turns around to face me, seeming confused. “Aurora?”

  “Drop it.” He holds his hands up in protest. Once we reach his car the thought of being in a moving vehicle turns my stomach. “I suggest you drive slow before I ruin your interior.”

  “Thanks for the warning.” We get into the car and a song begins to blare from the speakers. It’s Hunter Hayes song “Wanted”. Damon reaches toward the radio to change it, but I grab his hand.

  “Can we leave it on?” He smiles, nods his head, and puts his sunglasses on before pulling into traffic. As I’m listening to the song all I can help but think is how nice it would be, to have someone feel like that about you. To have someone that would jump through hoops for you, and expect nothing in return. I catch Damon staring at me and I feel like he can see into my damn soul.

  I look away hoping to break the connection but I can still feel his eyes on me. Thankfully, the light turns green, and he is now effectively distracted. The song ends and I turn toward Damon. “So where are we going?”

  “Don’t worry about it. It’s a surprise, kind of my way of apologizing for the other night.”

  I look away to hide the smile. I’m not ready to show him that part of me again, after the way he has been so hot and cold.

  Chapter Twelve

  We have been driving for almost four hours and the anticipation is killing me. The car pulls into an exit lane and when I look at the sign it says Myrtle Beach. Holy shit. He’s taking me to the beach? I look over at him and he has a huge grin on his face.